Quote Of The Day

I'll rip your teeth out and make you eat them......which will be a bitch without any teeth.

~Mike as he tried laying down next to the dog, who was growling at him

Not Old Yet. But, It's Happening

Like the title says, I'm not old yet, by any means, but there are tell-tale signs that it's happening. Each day when I look in the mirror, I look just a little bit older. My skin is just a little bit wrinklier (is that even a word?!). My hair is just a little bit grayer (I used to be able to count the gray hairs, but there's too many now).

It's happening whether I like it or not, and believe me, I do not like it. Not one bit!

Take for instance, when one of the kids is listening to their music and I tell them to turn it down. They look at me like I'm crazy when they tell me that the volume is "only on 2". Or, how about when I tell them that same music is incomprehensible. "I don't know why you listen to that crap. You can't understand a word he's saying!" That right there is my mother, flying out of my mouth before I realize what I'm saying. It's classic, and I can remember (believe it or not!) her saying the same exact thing to me when I was a teenager. Yep. Old age has its foot in the door.

Of course, there's the physical side of getting old, too. It doesn't just happen overnight. It creeps up on you so slowly, you don't really know for sure that it's happening until it has. I'm not talking about the gray hair or wrinkles. Those are typical, and expected. I'm talking about the physical things that happen behind the scenes, so to speak.

Boobs. It's not just women, either. I'm 38 years old. Like I said, not old. But, over the last couple of years, I've noticed things starting to head south, if you know what I mean. The word perky is no longer in my vocabulary when it comes to describing anything on my body. Perky personality, maybe. Perky breasts? Afraid not.

Getting out of bed in the morning is another problem that has presented itself as of late. I used to wake up in the morning feeling refreshed and ready to face the day. Now, when I wake up, the first thought that crosses my mind is how bad my back aches, or my hip aches, or that whatever I'm laying on aches. I sit up, groaning at the tightness of every muscle in my body, and throw my legs over the side of the bed, grimacing at the shooting pains in my knees. It's Arthur coming to visit already. It runs in my family, and he's decided to make a home with me early on. Yep. Old age .

Then there's the fact that I get up in the middle of the night to pee now. I NEVER used to get up at night. Once my head hit the pillow, I was unconscious until the alarm went off the next morning. Not anymore. The days of sleeping straight through the night are over. I get up once a night to pee, and could probably get up twice, but force myself to remain in bed until the alarm because my knees hurt too bad to do it again. Old age.

It's happening whether we like it or not, that is for sure. I guess it's how we deal with it that counts, though. They say you're only as old as you feel. Some days I feel a hundred and fifty, but most days I feel 38.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go rub some Ben-gay on my knees and take my Aleve before I get into bed.

The Evils of Facebook

Facebook really is evil. Trust me, I know.

It steals time from family. It robs one of all rational thought. It causes one to become oblivious to their surroundings. It's evil, take it from me.

I signed up for Facebook months and months ago. The only reason I did, was because my sister-in-law talked me into it. "It's so much fun!" she assured me, and it was.....for a few days. Then, I started acquiring friends. And those friends started sending me stuff. A hug here, and a smile there. It was cute. Then I started getting more stuff.....things I didn't have any idea what to do with. I couldn't keep up with it all, and it was time consuming. So, I stopped visiting Facebook.

Until last week.......

I saw my kids on Facebook playing some cafe game, and a farm game. It looked fun, so I went on to have a look. Before I knew it, I was playing these games and then some! Cafe World, Farmville, Fishville, anything you want to play-ville. It was freakin' fun!

Now, every waking moment is spent on Facebook. Laundry isn't getting done, the kids are mad because Mike is making them clean the house because, "Your mom is busy", and any plans have to be made around when food needs to be served or crops harvested. It's insane, I tell you!

I even had Becky serve some food for me that was ready while I was out this past Saturday night! I'm obsessed! My aunt and I spent an hour on the phone this afternoon discussing ways to set up her restaurant for maximum customer satisfaction. Can it get any crazier than that?

Don't answer that just yet.

How about laying awake at night thinking about how you can make your cafe more profitable?

It's all true, I swear.

Anyway, Facebook is evil, but I can't stop myself.

Speaking of which, I need to go now, I hear that one of my dishes is ready to be served (Cafe World is open in another tab, with the sound on!)

Random Thoughts Again

I'm a big fan of true crime stories, especially serial killers. TruTV has a great website that has an awesome crime library that I read frequently. I read a bunch of stories about serial killers, rapists, etc, etc. I know, morbid stuff, but I love it.

Anyway, this thought keeps crossing my mind when I read stories about women getting raped. You know, the ones that live to tell about it. I wonder if any of them thought about letting the rapist rape them?

Let me clarify.

You know how in hostage situations, you hear about someone trying to befriend the person holding everyone hostage? You know, to try to get him to either give up or at least not hurt anyone? Like, if he's your friend, he won't hurt you as quickly? This is the type of thing I mean.

Like, "OK, I'll let you have sex with me if you must, but please wear a condom." Or, acting like they are attracted to the attacker and want to have sex. I wonder what kind of response they'd get? Would the rapist be like, "Oh forget it. It's no fun if you agree to it." Would he leave her alone?

And my next question is, how would they prosecute? How would they prove it was rape if you consented to it and asked him to wear a condom, even if it was to save your life?

What a dilemma. I'm not making fun of something so serious. These are serious questions I've thought about and wondered answers to.

Maybe I should lay off the true crime stories for a while........

Observations

While out today running errands and picking up supper at McDonalds, I made a few observations. This will be a three-parter, so buckle up, sit back, and get ready for the ride!

Observation #1:

First of all, let me apologize in advance for this one. I'm sure it will offend a few people out there, but I can't help what I see. If you fall into this observation, and feel my opinion is wrong, feel free to leave me a comment. We'll hash it out right here and now, on this blog. I'm up for a good debate.

Here goes....

We visit our local Walmart Supercenter regularly, at least twice a week. There is an older woman greeting people at the door when they come in and leave. She has longish dark hair that is gray at the roots. She wears glasses, and most times has a sweater on in addition to her Walmart smock. She's always there, as are we. I'll wager a bet that she's there 95% of the time that we are.

In my mind, people greeters should be cheerful people. They should smile when they welcome you into the store, and they should tell you to have a nice day when you leave. To be good at being a people greeter, these simple criteria should be met.

This woman never, ever smiles.

She actually frowns as she says, "Welcome to Walmart". There is absolutely no emotion in her voice. She stands with her arms crossed and never makes eye contact. She is a poor people greeter. I wonder why she's still working there.

When we leave, she has the same scowl on her face and says, "Bye". That's it.

I always smile at her when she says welcome or bye, and say, "Thank you" or "Have a good day", hoping that it might be contagious. But, it isn't. She never smiles back. She never says thank you. She is a poor people greeter.

Now, here's where my opinion comes in.

How hard can this job be? How is it that you stand there, doing nothing but greeting people as they enter and leave the store, AND GET PAID FOR IT, not cause for a smile once in a while? Seriously, in this day and age, shouldn't she be thankful that she has a job that is so easy?

OK, OK. I realize that this is sounding harsh, and I do agree. I'm just a little ticked off at the rudeness of this woman, and the fact that her job requires just the opposite. It just doesn't make sense to me.

Observation #2:

McDonalds goes into full panic mode when more than 6 nuggets are ordered at a time.

Seriously.

We went to McDonalds to pick up supper tonight to take home. We ordered two six piece Chicken Mcnuggets. This was no big deal. The guys behind us ordered 60 nuggets, and one of them was contemplating ordering another 20 just to be sure they had enough.

It instantly became a shout-fest behind the counter. The girl taking the order yelled back, "We need nuggets down now! Need 60 nuggets and possibly more, STAT!" (She didn't really say stat, but it kind of fit here.)

The manager-on-duty yelled to the workers in the back (because they are so far away and didn't hear the first brain-rattling bellow), "Start dropping nuggets! We need nuggets now! Lots and lots of nuggets!"

The food preparers (is this what they are called?) started moving, around in circles it seemed. Everyone was busy doing something, but no one was sure what they should be doing. No one had ever ordered that many nuggets at one time before. Do we have enough? Oh my god! What if we don't have enough?! I don't think our fryers can handle that many nuggets at one time! What do we do? What do we do? What do we dooooooo????

They start yelling to one another, "Get more nuggets from the freezer!"

"How many?"

"I don't know, just grab a bunch! It's a big order! A thousand or so!"

Mike and I are standing there watching all of this while we wait for our food. It was comical to see them scrambling around as if they hadn't a clue what to do with an order that big.

I'm surprised to say, though, that we got our food in a timely fashion, despite the McNugget rush. I was somewhat disappointed by this, though, because I wanted to stay and see what 80 Chicken McNuggets looks like.

Observation #3

Throwback cans of Mountain Dew. When and where did these white cans exist?

Bought a limited edition 12-pack of Mountain Dew tonight at Walmart. The box is white, as are the cans. They say throwback cans. They are ugly and generic, if you ask me. I've never seen them before.

They must be throwback from a long, long time ago.